PIZZA EXPRESS

Pizza Express is where hygiene goes to die—zero stars, my friends. But before you run for the hills, remember it’s a crowd-pleaser. Daniel and Amrik found the pizza to be brilliant, making it confusing because, like, how do you reconcile good pizza with a hygiene rating that screams ‘danger’? The staff, led by the ever-friendly Michael, seem to be the stars of this show, navigating the chaos with a smile as they serve up those delicious pies.

But let’s not sugarcoat it: if you’re dining here, you might want to bring your own hand sanitizer and a strong stomach. The food might be good, but you’re playing a risky game of food roulette. So hey, if you’re feeling adventurous and up for a challenge, grab a slice and hope for the best.