MCDONALDS

Welcome to McDonald's, where you can count on cleanliness and disappointment in equal measure. With a sparkly 5-star hygiene rating and a dismal 2.9 Google score, it’s like the fast-food gods are playing a cruel joke. You know what you're getting into: cheap fries and burgers that taste like they’ve been under a heat lamp since the last lunar eclipse.

You could swing by for a quick bite if you’re starving and have no shame but don't expect anything remotely gourmet or memorable. The staff are probably moving at the speed of light to get you in and out faster than you can say 'Big Mac'. It’s useful as a last resort, but let’s just say your taste buds might file a formal complaint after you leave. 🍔